Don’t lie to kids
There was this guy sunbathing in the nude at the beach.
Well, this little girl comes up to him, so he covers his private parts with a newspaper.
The little girl says, ‘What’s under there?’ The man answers, ‘A bird.’
The girl goes away and the man falls asleep.
When he wakes up, he is in a hospital and in great pain.
A doctor comes up to his bed and asks, ‘What happened?’
The man answers, ‘I don’t know.
I was at the beach and I fell asleep after talking to a little girl.’
So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses.
When they get there, they see the little girl the man was talking about.
So they ask her if she did anything to the man.
She answers, ‘ I didn’t do anything to the man, but while he was sleeping, I played with his bird.
After a while, it spit at me, so I broke its neck, burned its nest, and smashed all its eggs!’
Kids @ Playground
Almost every evening when the weather is good, I’ll bring the kids to the playground to play. Kids from the area come out to play ever so often and boy, these kids do have abundance of energy making them run around a lot without feeling the least tired.
One of the day we were there, decide to take out my camera to snap some photos of the kids and their friends. It’s nice that at the end of the day, we can look back at the photos and remember how it was. This is very much so when they get older and start to do their own things without wanting you to be around them. (more…)
Sex in the Dark
This one had been in circulation for quite some time now, but still is a good laugh.
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years.
Every time they made love, the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous.
She figures she would break him of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device… A vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one.
She went completely ballistic. ‘You impotent bastard,’ She screamed at him, ‘How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!’
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly:
‘I’ll explain the toy. .. You explain the kids.’
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