Where To Cross The Border?

If You Cross The North Korean Border Illegally
You get 12 years Hard Labour.

If You Cross The Iranian Border Illegally
You Are Detained Indefinitely.

If You Cross The Afghan Border Illegally,
You Get Shot.

If You Cross The Saudi Arabian Border Illegally
You Will Be Jailed.

If You Cross The Chinese Border Illegally
You May Never Be Heard Again. (more…)

Cock Story

A farmer rears 25 young hens and 1 old cock.

As the old cock could no longer handle his job efficiently, the farmer bought one young cock from the market.

Old cock: “Welcome to join me, we will work together towards productivity.”

Young cock: “What do you mean? As far as I know, you are old and should retire.”

Old cock: “Young boy, there are twenty-five hens here, can’t I help you with some?”

Young cock: “No! Not even one, all of them will be mine.”

Old cock: “In this case, I shall challenge you to a competition and if I win, you shall allow me to have one hen and if I lose you will have all.”

Young cock: “Ok! What kind of competition?” (more…)

Wive’s Night Out

Two women friends had gone for a girl’s night out; both were very faithful and loving wives. However, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on The Bacardi Breezers.

Incredibly drunk & walking home, they needed to pee. So they stopped at the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend, however, was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with it.

After the girls did their business, they proceeded to go home.

The next day, one woman’s husband was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said, ‘These damn girls’ night outs have got to stop. I’m starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties.’

‘You think that’s bad’ said the other husband, ‘Mine is lying in bed with a card stuck in her bum that says:
‘From all of us at the Fire Station. We’ll Never forget you.’

DEAF WIFE…..

A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

“Here’s what you do,” said the Doctor, “stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.” (more…)

How Ah Lian performs at Interview

Ah Hua went for a job interview to be a secretary.

When the manager saw Ah Hua’s colorful attire and gold, white-highlighted hair, his mind is screaming, ‘NOT THIS WOMAN!!!’. so chekai, Nevertheless, he still had to interview Ah Hua.

So he told Ah Hua,’If you can form a sentence using the words that I give you, then I will give you a chance! The words are GREEN, PINK, YELLOW, BLUE, WHITE , PURPLE and BLACK.’

Ah Hua thought for a while and said, ‘I hear the phone GREEN , GREEN , GREEN, then I go and PINK up the phone, I say YELLOW….. BLUE’s that? WHITE did you say?

Aiyah, wrong numberlah…..Don’t PURPLELY disturb people and don’t call BLACK, ok? Kum Siah.

The manager fainted….